Tag Archives: coffee

a few thoughts to kick off the week, i.e. pastries, coffee and “rock of love bus”

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1. never drive to work in the morning behind an entemannn’s truck if you can help it. especially if you have a travel cup of coffee from home in the car with you. i don’t think this needs any further explanation.

2. if that travel mug of coffee smells just a wee bit like palmolive, and maybe the coffee tastes a little soapy, and you still drink it, that means you really like coffee. (oops–‘cuse me. i just burped up a bubble.)

3. i think i’ve given up hope on bret michaels (former lead singer of 80s hairband poison, boob-crazy protagonist of rock of love/rock of love bus, just in case you don’t watch trash teevee like we do) . not that i had that much hope for him/in him to begin with. a couple observations: the girls on this show, their boobs are so big and so high up, they might as well be at a renaissance festival (and if you’ve been to one, goodness gracious i’m sure you know what i’m talking about). meaning: if they’re ever on a boat, and it capsizes? they will float w/out any effort at all until they are rescued. anyway, it seems his love and enthusiasm for these girls is directly proportionate to the blondness of their hair, thickness of their eye makeup and yes, the size of their boobs. it just makes me laugh. he’s very earnest, in a way, tho. hard to put my finger on what it is. which only makes things funnier. 

4. and my favorite line of the entire series? big john: “i TOLD you not to act slutty and whore-y!” did he yell this at the drunk, big-boobed blond who was crying on speed bump? or when two of the drunk, big-boobed blonds were wrestling and making out? ha. either way, he was quite earnest when he said this, too. which, again, made it even funnier. i bet you can find this on youtube somewhere. if you do and you feel sad, watch it and it will cheer you up. see that? don’t ever tell me i’m not helpful.

rock

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quick poll: what’s more annoying…?

going to subway and coming back to your office smelling like a sub?

or stopping at 7-11 (or “sevs,” as we call it in jersey) for a cuppa coffee and smelling like a mini-refried-deep-fried-fake-beef  toquito for the rest of the day?

this is a hard call, as both seem to equally permeate clothing, especially in the winter when you’re wearing sweaters and scarves.

anyway, let me know what you think. b/c right now i smell like a sub and it’s driving me crazy.

i know instant coffee gets a bad rap

but i just want to take this opportunity (as i sip piping hot, yes, instant coffee) to say i think it’s unwarranted.

i am one who isn’t ashamed to admit when she likes something lame, unpopular, uncool or just plain cheesy. i’ve admitted my ongoing affinity for britney spears (despite her varying, very public mental states; hey, don’t judge. how would you act if you were constantly followed and scrutinized? i bet we’d all look more than a little nuts under the microscope). that mtv paris hilton show, “my new bff.” also lindsay lohan’s apparent lez-out w/”gal pal” (i.e. gayhomosexualgirlfriend) samantha ronson (hey, go’head and be gay for a day, girl! i’ve got no problem w/it! send pics!). i also love new jersey (HOLLA! where i was raised, YO). and i’m adding instant coffee to the mix b/c I’M NOT ASHAMED!

i didn’t even know i liked it until sheer desperation of terrible office coffee (eight o’clock bean, ugh) threw me into its freeze-dried embrace. i like to say that “bad coffee is better than no coffee” (i also say “bad curry is better than no curry”; i’m a huge indian food fan) but when it comes to coffee at my office, i need to break my own rule. i just can’t drink it. it actually gives me a headache.

enter instant coffee. all you need is hot water and you’re in business. you can make it as strong as you like and it’s ready immediately. [the best brand, in my humble opinion, is taster’s choice. you can even buy boxes (for just over a buck!) of these adorable little single-serve packets, perfect for when you’re up at the cracka’dawn in western pee-ay and there’s not a caffeinated cuppa coffee to be found.] don’t get me wrong, i loooove freshly brewed coffee but when i’m in need, i reach for the little, brown, caffeinated crunchies–my 9-5 savior. 

so there. i said it. the secret’s out, ppl. check back soon for more skeletons from my gayhomosexual closet.

holly’s grandma’s microwave

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is so old and so awesome that i’ve got to tell you about it.

that’s it, above. not the best photo (c/o my cellio), i know. i was heating up some coffee [when it comes to coffee i’m no snob, and certainly not above heating up some from earlier (sometimes way earlier) in the day] over thanksgiving and was like, that’s it: i need to take a photo of it right now. every single time i use her microwave i think, man it’s so friggin fantastic that it still works after all these years. in fact, it’s so old it wasn’t even called a microwave back in the day! look closely (below)…

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it’s called a “Multi-Wave”!! i know, right?? and check its digital display!

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sweet, right?!!

holly’s grandma (first name: joanne) is one of those rare ppl that take such good care of things that they last forever. it’s not so much that she’s frugal or anything, it’s just that, well, i guess it hasn’t broken yet. “she refuses to get a new one,” explains holly. she actually bought it for her mother [holly’s great-grandma, aka “Big Grandma,” something she liked being called (actually she preferred “Fat Grandma,” but that sort of morphed into Big Grandma, tho she still liked the former better). joanne is still called “Little Grandma” to this day even tho Big Grandma passed some time ago], but, holly continues, “if she knew anybody cooked her food in there she wouldn’t eat it. she just refused to use it.” it was stovetop (or the oven) for Big Grandma all the way. the family has tried for years to convince grandma joanne to buy a new one but she refuses. for her purposes (cooking a baked potato here and there, reheating thanksgiving leftovers once a year, making early-morning tea for family over the weekend), it’s just fine. so, i guess that’s the story of the microwave. my grandmother had a vacuum that just wouldn’t quit either. by the end of her life, i think we had trouble even finding bags for it. oh gosh, which reminds me (b/c my late grandma had a really old tv that she refused to replace)…her tv. omg, holly’s grandma’s console tv. that’ll have to wait til next time.

well, i wish i had something “deep” to tell you but i don’t. for the moment, the well’s run dry. i just got over the flu (omg, ppl. take your vit. c) and my brainpower’s not at its finest. it’s back to work w/me tomorrow. the wedding photos are coming soon i promise. 😉

there is absolutely nothing wrong with eating lunch at 11:30

in fact, i encourage it.

there’s two things you ought to know about me before you read this any further: one, this is, for all intents and purposes, a blog still very much in test-mode. well, these first entries anyway. i don’t have a clue of its focus as of yet, and it’s very existence is most likely due to whey protein overload (thank YOU starbucks smoothie! have you tried yet? omG delish!) and over-caffeination (again: thank you, my dear old friend S. Bux), but mostly my fabulous food blogger friend—and bff, i must add—nicole, she of cucinanicolina—who advised me the other day (after excessive cross-country txt msging, i may add.) to “just start.” just to start typing and see where it takes me. so here i am!

number two: yes, i do—more often than not—eat lunch at 11:30. that’s a.m. sometimes even earlier. in fact, oftentimes i’m hungry for lunch at 10:30. (like right now, as i write this.) i used to be embarrassed to even admit it, let alone eat it. but i don’t care anymore. i suppose i’ll discuss some of the reasons why i think get hungry so early in later posts (these will all be theories, as i really and truly do not know). but for now, i’m just putting it out there.
and hell, i’ll add a couple more things while i’m at it:
1. i get a lot of headaches. unfortunately. so if i disappear for a couple days, that’s probably why. fear not, tho! i always return. usually in a downright awesome mood.
2. um, i wear a lot of black, but, contrary to popular belief (and by popular belief i mean that of middle-aged admin ladies), am not goth. not goth. just from jersey. wear frosty lipstick, too. also a north jersey trait, i’ve discovered. am also a big fan of bangs. and i hear i chew gum pretty loudly, too. classy chick, right?? 

3. i’m 29, on the cusp of 30 (october thankyouverymuch), but feel perpetually 15. in fact, i frequent mall psuedo-punk franchise hot topic more than i’d like to admit. (hey, cut me some slack, ppl. where’s a girl supposed to find a ramones t-shirt around these parts anyway?) funny thing is that when i walk in, the grumpy (but pleasantly so) cashiers say hi like i’m not the office drone i some days fear i’ve become so i guess i put up a pretty good front. (well, i guess the bangs help. also said loud gum-chewing.)
4. i live in baltimore. (lots more on baltimore in the near-future, i’m sure.) grew up in, yes, new jersey. lived in D.C. for a good long while and miss it terribly (but still get my hairs did there, so you know i’m back pretty often) what else, what else…ah, right. am gay, gay, gay. in fact, i’m having what i like to call a Big Fat Gay Wedding this fall. i’m tying the knot with my fabulous holly, partner of seven+ years. i’m also jewish. so the gay jokes and the jewish jokes are ON, ppl. don’t even start. b/c if you ARE one, you can poke fun. and, if nothing else, this blog’s gonna be fun.

i think that’s all for now, b/c i’m hungry as all get-out. like, my hands are practically shaking. i know, right?? and it’s not even 11:30.