well the neighborhood’s bustling again

drugdealers–and the ppl that hang around them–are like roaches: for every one that disappears, five more take his or her place. there is no such thing as “one roach” (just as there’s “no such thing as one mouse,” some home specialist said on the today show this morning. i can attest to that.  i can also attest to the roaches, but i digress). there is no such thing as a lone drugdealer. or hooker. or any such neighborhood riffraff. this is just my theory. but i think i’m right on the mark.

another one of my theories: as soon as you start telling yourself that things are SO much better–omG i haven’t gotten a headache in two whole weeks! the very next day? THREE-DAY MIGRAINE–they will go to sh*t. this is not always so. but watch what you tell yourself. or others.

holly and i were just thinking–trembly little happy thoughts that were too fragile even to mention to each other–that things in our neighborhood were settling down.

the paddywagon came a few weeks ago and carted off most of the local corner house’s dealers, hookers, etc. things were quiet. for, like, a few days. it was nice. then, of course, a whole new crew–with fancy jeans and shiny belts–came to replace them. but then it rained for four days straight and they disappeared. (drugdealers apparently do not like the rain. at least not in baltimore. go figure!) and now it seems like the power in the drughouse was turned off (at least on the first floor; the peeping tom lives on the second floor. he’s got lights. i don’t even want to talk about that freak.) and i honestly think the cold drove them away. (they don’t like to be cold either. hm.)

well now it’s friggin warm again (maryland weather) and lo and behold, more new ppl. more than that, some of the old hookers (and, yes, some of them really are “old hookers”)/dealers/users (?) must’ve been released from prison and they’re back friggin running their friggin mouths all. day. long. you can hear them from around the block. i kid you not.

for all of you that smoke, esp. you ladies, stop right now. just stop. if not for your health or your looks then for your goshdarn VOICE. b/c i swear, if you’re my age (early 30s), in about 20 years you will sound like a baltimore hooker. and trust me, you don’t want that.


4 responses to “well the neighborhood’s bustling again

  1. I just watched “Papillon,” a great film about a small-time French thief sentenced to life in a penal colony for killing a pimp.

    Uh, shouldn’t he have gotten a medal instead?

  2. Luckily, winter is coming, and cold days are around the corner. There has been some research to suggest bad weather reduces crime: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/03/nyregion/03murder.html

    Of course, I’ve also seen things connecting crime rates to the phases of the moon (more related to how dark the night is than to werewolves). At the very least, I wouldn’t expect to see as many short skirts on the street corner as the weather turns.

  3. i do not advocate this type of action and yet…i see where you’re coming from.

  4. very interesting article, andrew! let’s hear it for bad weather! at least it gives us a break, if only a tiny one.

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