there are better things out there for me

i know this. i feel it. b/c i was laid off today. one door closes, a window opens.

i wasn’t the only one, either. ten percent of the organization was cut, 18 ppl.

i’ll tell you all, for those of you that don’t know me personally, or don’t know me well, i was miserable for a long time, so i’m looking at this as a blessing, an opportunity, more than anything.

i’m not going to go into it b/c, while i may have what some might call a big mouth (me??? never), i like to keep things classy. (anyway, all the juicy stuff is for my book, so you’re just going to have to wait 😉 ) but. i will say the following:

1) i have a sneaking suspicion i’m going to be getting a lot less headaches now.

2) while i’m stressing about cashflow (holly was laid off three weeks before our wedding, so, this doubly sucks) i am overwhelmed w/joy that i will be able to enjoy the season that i am ape-sh*t crazy for: fall.

 as in, i won’t be chained to my (ex) desk in my (ex) windowless office. i’ll be able to actually (gasp!) walk around, go to the park (with holly. during the *day*…sigh), stomp on soon-to-be-crunchy leaves and pet as many puppies as i want w/out any concern for time. as in: no busybody admin ladies who are all oddly obsessed w/my comings and goings noting in their little black admin books when i’ve left and when i return. the delight i feel at the prospect of this …well, i almost have no words for it.

3) twitter. w/said admin busybodies out of my hair, the tweets are unlocked, baby! it is ON! i’m in the process of putting the feed back up. bring it!

and, finally, last but certainly certainly not least:

4) lunch. lunch at home. and i don’t even have to wait til 11:30. (and i can eat it on the roof.)

good night, my lovelies. and to my facebook peeps: a million thanks for the kind words! (turns out facebook isn’t just great for coming out, launching blogs, having Big Fat Gay Weddings (BFGWs) and birthdays. it’s also pretty awesome when you lose your job.) you all are saying what i’ve been thinking since i got the news at 10 this morning, my breakfast barely digested and my to-go coffee mug from home still hot: this is a brand new beginning for me. and i’ll tell you something in case you don’t already know:

i’m completely unsinkable.

and like all those friggin cats that found their way into our walls this winter, i always land on my feet. something wonderful is going to come of this. i don’t know what right now, but it will. and altho i’m stressed in an unfamiliar new way, i have my life back. i. have my life. back. and i’m never going to lose myself like that again.


11 responses to “there are better things out there for me

  1. I can’t help but think of David Gray’s “New Horizons,” which begins “weight on my shoulder, and I’m walking so tall, out into the new horizon…”

    A singer I like who doesn’t have That Voice, but A Voice…

  2. that’s exactly how i’m feeling. thanks, john. *hearts*

  3. I will keep my eye out for you.

    ::::::::::::No more windowless office!:::::::::::::::::::;

  4. carrie, i know you got my back!! (and i got yours) wait, what’s that bright thing hanging in that blue thing?? oh it’s the SUN in the SKY! i didn’t recognize it after so long in a windowless office 😉

  5. Yeah for less headaches! I am sure you are right about that one.

    And now you have more time to spend with those cats. You might just learn to like them and bring one into your home. 🙂

  6. Hey, if you lovebirds want to take a cheap mimi-honeymoon to Philly for a day (now that you’ve got some time) you know you have a fold out couch to stay.

  7. You ARE completely unsinkable. You’ll find something great! Smooch!

  8. no cats! never! heheh.

    vi: we love philly!! my parents just got a nice condo there so we’re in town a lot. let’s get together??

    andrew: *hearts*

  9. Hey Jess.

    So sorry to hear about the loss of income. But I’m confident you’re right. You’ll find something better and more you. And in the meantime, enjoy life a little.


  10. lesh!
    you are such a toughy cause yer a jersey girl and i’m so proud of you for all your past and future accomplishments!!!!
    (and should you get sick of the sun in b-more, come see the sun in boston!)

  11. jen and jess: thank you both so much. man, all you guys are so awesome.

    (p.s. jersey girls totally rule 😉 )

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