every couple, every household, i should say, has those mundane statements that are repeated over and over around the house. they’re usually yelled to someone in another room or upstairs.
“do we have milk?”
“did you take out the trash?”
“where’s the toothpaste?”
“are we outta t.p.?”
“have you seen the old man lately?”
wait, what?
“honey, have you seen the old man lately?”
yes, that’s a big one in our household. “the old man” is the old guy next door. he’s not quite a shut-in, but nearly. one of our biggest nightmares is to well…is to not see him for a while and, since we share walls w/him, start to smell something and (*shudder*)…yeah. so holly and i ask each other every so often if we’ve seen him. when both of us answer “no,” it’s usually followed by one of us saying, “geez, i hope he didn’t kick it.”
look, i know you’re crinkling up your nose right now, and i’m not trying to be gross. i’m being realistic. that type of stuff happens, esp. in the city and esp. amongst older folks that don’t have a lot of family or friends. the whole thing is really sad, b/c i kind of feel like we’re the only two ppl around here that take note of his, well, just take note if they see him around or not.
he’s not the best neighbor. his place is a wreck. yard is overgrown like you would not believe (i honestly did not know that weeds could get so big. or that they could blossom. and/or grow berries). gutters aren’t connected (and then we get his roof water in *our* basement). a rat factory of a garage. i really won’t go on, lest i completely gross you out and you never want to come over, simply b/c knowing all that is just next door is too much for you (sissy! you would never survive one minute here in “the city that reads”! never!). anyway, even tho the root of all this is sad, it just strikes me as pretty ridiculous that one of the things we normally say to each other revolves around our old man neighbor.
in other news, i tried the new starbucks VIA instant coffee–oh excuse me, they’re calling it “ready brew instant coffee,” ha, my mistake–last night (they were giving out free samples) and i gotta say, not too shabby! if you’ve been reading this blog for a while, or if you know me in “real life” (ha), you know that while i’m a true coffee lover, i’m not pretentious about it. so, just like my unbridled enthusiasm for tragically unhip things like, say…britney spears or…leftovers (omg i totally heart leftovers), i do love my instant coffee from time to time. and i will shout it from the rooftops.
i am telling you this b/c i am going to take the starbucks VIA challenge this weekend. there’s this promotion going on this weekend. they’ll be putting the instant coffee side-by-side w/the fresh-brewed coffee. you taste both, and if you can pick out the instant, you get a free drink. i am so going to win. i’m not a very competitive person, but i’m telling you, this one, it’s all or nothing, baby! bring it!
